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In an Emergency
If you are at home & you are being threatened or attacked:
Stay away from the kitchen (the abuser can find weapons, like knives, there).
Stay away from bathrooms, closets or small spaces where the abuser can trap you.
Get to a room with a door or window to escape.
Get to a room with a phone to call for help; lock the abuser outside if you can.
Call 911 (or your local emergency number) right away for help; get the dispatcher's name.
Think about a neighbor or friend you can run to for help.
If a police officer comes, tell him/her what happened; get his/her name & badge number.
Get medical help if you are hurt.
Take pictures of bruises or injuries.
Call a domestic violence program or shelter (some are listed here); ask them to help you make a safety plan.
How to Protect Yourself at Home
Learn where to get help; memorize emergency phone numbers.
Keep a phone in a room you can lock from the inside; if you can, get a cellular phone that you keep with you at all times.
If the abuser has moved out, change the locks on your door; get locks on the windows.
Plan an escape route out of your home; teach it to your children.
Think about where you would go if you need to escape.
Ask your neighbors to call the police if they see the abuser at your house; make a signal for them to call the police, for example, if the phone rings twice, a shade is pulled down or a light is on.
Pack a bag with important things you'd need if you had to leave quickly; put it in a safe place, or give it to a friend or relative you trust.
Include cash, car keys & important information such as: court papers, passport or birth certificates, medical records & medicines, immigration papers.
Get an unlisted phone number.
Block caller ID.
Use an answering machine; screen the calls.
Take a good self-defense course.
How to Make Your Children Safer
Teach them not to get in the middle of a fight, even if they want to help.
Teach them how to get to safety, to call 911, to give your address & phone number to the police.
Teach them who to call for help.
Tell them to stay out of the kitchen.
Give the principal at school or the daycare center a copy of your court order; tell them not to release your children to anyone without talking to you first; use a password so they can be sure it is you on the phone; give them a photo of the abuser.
Make sure the children know who to tell at school if they see the abuser.
Make sure that the school knows not to give your address or phone number to ANYONE.
How to Protect Yourself Outside the Home
Change your regular travel habits.
Try to get rides with different people.
Shop and bank in a different place.
Cancel any bank accounts or credit cards you shared; open new accounts at a different bank.
Keep your court order and emergency numbers with you at all times.
Keep a cell phone & program it to 911 (or other emergency number).
How to Make Yourself Safer at Work
Keep a copy of your court order at work.
Give a picture of the abuser to security and friends at work.
Tell your supervisors - see if they can make it harder for the abuser to find you.
Don't go to lunch alone.
Ask a security guard to walk you to your car or to the bus.
If the abuser calls you at work, save voice mail and save e-mail.
Your employer may be able to help you find community resources.
How to Be Safe at the Courthouse
Sit as far away from the abuser as you can; you don't have to look at or talk to the abuser; you don't have to talk to the abuser's family or friends if they are there.
Bring a friend or relative with you to wait until your case is heard.
Tell a bailiff or sheriff that you are afraid of the abuser and ask him/her to look out for you.
Make sure you have your court order before you leave.
Ask the judge or the sheriff to keep the abuser there for a while when court is over; leave quickly.
If you think the abuser is following you when you leave, call the police immediately.
If you have to travel to another State for work or to get away from the abuser, take your protection order with you; it is valid everywhere.
What is Domestic Violence?
The Power and Control Wheel
The Abuser & The Victim
The Cycle of Abuse
Screening Questions
Myths & Facts
Stalking
Dating Violence
Safety
General Safety Tips
Protective Orders
Seeking Police Protection
Safety Plans
Computer Safety
Sexual Assault Safety Tips
Resources
