There are no stereotypical domestic violence victims.
By gender
By age
By race
By ethnicity
By socio-economic class
Domestic violence is not confined to "certain groups." Do not try to predict who is a batterer and who is a victim of domestic violence.
Ask the following questions to determine whether domestic violence is occurring:
- Everyone argues or fights with their partner or spouse now and then. When you argue or fight at home, what happens? Do you ever change your behavior because you are afraid of the consequences of a fight?
- Do you feel that your partner or spouse treats you well? Is there anything that goes on at home that makes you feel afraid?
- Has your partner or spouse ever hurt or threatened you or your children? Has your partner or spouse ever put their hands on you against your will? Has your partner or spouse ever forced you to do something you did not want to do? Does your partner or spouse criticize you or your children a lot?
- Has your partner or spouse ever tried to keep you from taking medication you needed or from seeking medical help? Does your partner refuse to let you sleep at night?
- Has your partner or spouse ever hurt your pets or destroyed your clothing, objects in your home, or something which you especially cared about? Does your partner or spouse throw or break objects in the home during arguments?
- Does your partner or spouse act jealously, for example, always calling you at work or home to check up on you? Is it hard for you to maintain relationships with your friends, relatives, neighbors, or co-workers because your partner or spouse disapproves of, argues with, or criticizes them? Does your partner or spouse accuse you unjustly of flirting with others or having affairs? Has your partner or spouse ever tried to keep you from leaving the house?
- Does your spouse or partner make it hard for you to find or keep a job or to go to school?
- Every family has their own way of handling finances. Does your partner or spouse withhold money from you when you need it? Do you know what your family's assets are? Do you know where important documents like bank books, check books, financial statements, birth certificates, and passports for you and members of your family are kept? If you wanted to see or use any of them, would your partner or spouse make it difficult for you to do so? Does your spouse or partner sometimes spend large sums of money and refuse to tell you why or what the money was spent on?
- Has your spouse or partner ever forced you to have sex or made you do things during sex that make you feel uncomfortable? Does your partner demand sex when you are sick, tired, or sleeping?
- Has your spouse or partner ever used or threatened to use a weapon against you? Are there guns in your home?
- Does your spouse or partner abuse drugs or alcohol? What happens?
